Thursday, November 14, 2013
On the day of Viva's passing, I took her body home with me for Kenzo to understand what happened.
It had rained the whole week, but on that day the sun was shining abundantly.
So instead of taking Viva inside, I laid her down in the sun at the start of the driveway to our house. The sun warmed her body and gave her that beautiful golden glow.
Kenzo frantically sniffed the air around Viva, with his nose slightly up. He only came close to her paws, which he touched gently with his nose, still sniffing.
He remained restless and acted like he wanted to go for a walk, so I let him. I followed him down the driveway. At the end of it, just before the point where we usually would have turned left into the forest, Kenzo stopped.
He went straight back to Viva and sniffed the air around her one more time, and then retreated a couple of yards, where he laid down, with his side to Viva and his face upright, pointing towards the road. People and dogs passed by in the distance, but Kenzo didn't move, neither did he made a sound.
I think - I hope - he understood Viva was no more.
After I returned Viva and said the last farewell, we tried to follow our usual routine for the rest of the day and the days to come as much as we could for Kenzo's sake. He seemed himself. We made sure he didn't experienced we were sad. We haven't changed anything in the house, and Viva's things are still where they used to be.
But he is not his bubbly self, because of one tiny difference. For each walk, training session, play or cuddle, I have to invite him. Usually it is Kenzo that invites me. Therefore I know, that first on the day where Kenzo will seek contact once more, he has had the time he needed to give Viva a new place in his life.
Next to the family, Viva was the center focal point of Kenzo's life and purpose, always trying to keep his "big sister" safe. Although I have never before helped a dog through mourning a companion, if I listen good enough and let him "talk", I know we can make it through Viva's loss together.
It is still early, Kenzo just needs more time, like the rest of us. It is only natural. He will be alright again one day, and all I can do is support him getting there. Finding this purpose, gives me strength too.
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